Stelvio bans rim brakes, Ribble unicycle, E-Chamois cream, road tax, Cancellara's comeback, oval cassettes — cycling does April Fool's Day; MGIF WTF; I'm dreaming of a white Tour of Flanders; Buy 8 chains get 1 free; (Ned) Flanders + more on the live blog

Who knew this would turn into a trilogy? It's time for part three of cycling's April Fool's antics... This is our Return of the Chainring, The Pogfather 3, The Girl Who Kicked The Hornet's FTP Test, X-Men: The Last (Track)Stand, The Matrix (90) Revolutions (Per Minute). The story ends here (for another year)...

But, unlike The Godfather, we might just have saved the best for last...

First to the stage: Muc-Off's invisible jersey...

It's those pesky cyclists not wearing hi-vis again...

Next up, a classic from Velotech who have reinvented the cassette. Remember when Chris Froome started running osymetric chainrings and the cycling world melted? (Even if Bobby Julich was, as far as we know, the first to do so back in 2004) Well, here's the follow-up...

Veloskin got the memo too... announcing an E-Chamois cream.

"With e-bike sales spiking, we have jumped on the trend to provide a specific Chamois Cream to keep your e-riding supercharged! Formulated to keep both rider and bike in harmony and synchronised, the new Veloskin E-Chamois Cream contains groundbreaking nano technology blended with our traditional ingredients, which can extend and improve the performance of your e-bike's battery!"

Bike subscription service Swapfiets was pleased to announce the "world's-first penny-farthing subscription service"...available for just £10 per month, a lock for added security, and the guarantee of a free replacement if yours is stolen...

And finally, before my brain shuts down, Canadian Cycling Magazine went for the 'story' about the UCI announcing that all cyclists must install a dropper post, following Matej Mohorič’s historic win at Milan-San Remo. 

> road.cc Podcast: Matej Mohorič says he could have descended faster at Milan-San Remo if motorbikes weren’t in the way

It really is amazing how much big news drops on the morning of April 1...

> 2022 Specialized Allez Sprint vs Tarmac SL7: which is best?

There was simply too many April Fool's ruses to pack into part one...so we're back with a sequel...

First up, the CAMO-HANGAR [©️], possibly the joke most worthy of being followed up on...

Don't want to disrupt our car dominated landscape with cycle storage?

Try the all-new CAMO-HANGAR©️ from Possible!

✅Blends in with all other SUVs
✅Won't trigger anti-cycling sentiment
✅Only pay for parking 1 car a year instead of 5 bikes pic.twitter.com/TYQKHdQ3vT

— Possible (@_wearepossible) April 1, 2022

Or how about the Pearson Tearaways, a cleat alternative that we're not sure will stick (ba dum tss). As per the shiny press release which would put many genuine product launches to shame..."As the world’s oldest cycling company, Pearson has been championing innovation since 1860. In an exciting new collaboration with cycling shoe specialists Lake, Pearson is proud to announce the Pearson + Lake Tearaway Cycling Shoe. Designed for life on and off and on the bike, they’re the perfect choice for anyone tired of click-clacking around in cleats."

The product?

"Grafted to a luxury Lake sneaker-trainer, the Tearaways feature proprietary RUG® technology. The acronym stands for ‘Road, Urban, Gravel’ because this really is the only cycling shoe you’ll ever need. The secret lies in the sole (a bit like life), which features a Vibram base for exceptional stiffness and durability.

"This has been overlaid with our ground-breaking slip-free Velcro, to offer class-leading pedal adherence. The shoe is supplied with corresponding, complimentary pedals, and which, again, boast technology developed exclusively by Pearson. (And Lake, obviously.)" This might be the best one yet...

Sliding away from cycling for a second, Little Tikes are taking on soaring fuel prices...

And finally, CloseTheGap got the 'scoop' on cycling governing bodies making bells mandatory in all road and mountain bike races from 2023, although with midday coming and going, and the ruse rubbished, we'll leave it to you to decide who's the only bell in the peloton...

Hi-Diddly-Ho, cycling fans! It's time for another 10/10 team announcement...

Here's who Ned will be cheering for on Sunday🦁 #RVV22 pic.twitter.com/TTe4r1lAyb

— Trek-Segafredo (@TrekSegafredo) April 1, 2022

Koppenberg #RVV pic.twitter.com/9AjwxOTcgD

— Aitor Agirrezabal (@aagirrezabal) April 1, 2022

The slippy stones of the Koppenberg are hard enough in the rain. In the snow and ice? Forget about it...

The snow continues to fall in Flanders, but is not sticking to the roads, so all should be well for Sunday's races (especially considering the weather forecast we shared on the blog earlier).

We wondered if teams would cancel their recon rides, and Bora-Hansgrohe appear to be the first to break rank...

Bora-Hansgrohe has postponed its Flanders recon because of the snow in Flanders. It's still coming down, though it's not sticking to the roads. Won't be around on Sunday, we hope.

— Sadhbh O'Shea (@SadhbhOS) April 1, 2022

Unless that's their entry for the most underwhelming April Fool's award... 

The teams in Belgium have woken up to snow on the ground in Flanders...

April doet wat hij wil. @RondeVlaanderen pic.twitter.com/1TvGxdySVy

— Ard Bierens (@ard_bierens) April 1, 2022

There's plenty of times (a day) I'm jealous of the pros. Waking up for a recon on cobbles in those conditions is not one of them. Perhaps a forgiving, and slightly nervous sports director, will postpone training until the afternoon?

Two days to #RVV22 🌨 pic.twitter.com/5KH9XvD1fb

— Trek-Segafredo (@TrekSegafredo) April 1, 2022

 Will the snow stick around for the races on Sunday? It doesn't look likely. The forecast is predicting light snow until lunch time, and despite lows of -3 overnight, the cobbles should stay dry until Sunday.

 One team who won't be on the startline is Israel – Premier Tech, who have withdrawn due to medical reasons. The squad's Flanders line-up suffered a second covid positive yesterday, having already been depleted by illness and injury, and with other riders in Spain for GP Miguel Indurain, the team of Sep Vanmarcke has decided to skip De Ronde.

Manager Kjell Carlström explained the decision is in the best interests of the team and peloton: "This decision has not been taken lightly but we feel this is our only option at this stage. It is no secret we have had covid and other illness and also crash-induced injuries wiping out the majority of our riders at one stage or another in recent weeks.

"Right now, we have very few healthy riders who could take to the start line, but they are now close contacts, and it is out of respect for the race and the rest of the peloton, that we are making this decision. It is our duty of care to the other teams to not be willingly sending riders who have been exposed to covid into a race."

Cyclegranny is a Twitter account well worth a follow for the chronicles of one person's experience using a bike to get around Sheffield.

"I called this video WTF!" they said...and it's hard to argue with that assessment...this one's WTF meets MGIF...

I called this video WTF! I don't know what she was planning but I can say there wasn't much thought there. Attempting an overtake approaching a mini roundabout and nearly causing a head on collision with another cyclist. In a hurry to get to the end of a traffic queue. pic.twitter.com/UEletk5VqT

— Cyclegranny 🚴‍♀️ (@anneramsey740) March 31, 2022

Approaching a mini roundabout which, presumably, the driver didn't see. I say presumably because the following manoeuvre would be beyond belief otherwise... With that said I'm not sure how they'd miss it, but maybe I'll stick to saying what happened rather than trying to explain the unexplainable.

The WTF MGIF backs out when they see a second cyclist coming around the roundabout, you can almost see the 'oh s*** that's a roundabout' penny drop...

So, what would have been the reward for their speedy pass? Sitting in traffic a couple of seconds sooner, of course...

A tale as old as time...(well, at least as old as motor vehicles)...