Counting up London's 'no cycling' signs; Dirty Sanchez star completes 10 Ironman triathlons in ten days; Dylan Teuns suffers bizarre gardening accident; Cyclists burn 40 Cream Eggs a day at the Tour de France + more in today's Live Blog

Whitecross Road is notorious for speeding.

Full story here.

"NO CYCLING" Signs.
There are 12,240 across London - over half of them thanks to Wandsworth Council @wandbc which has them on every ***king lampost. pic.twitter.com/oyTUnFN1kM

— always last (@lastnotlost) August 1, 2019

Apparently Wandsworth Council lead the way with erecting 'no cycling' signs, with an astonishing 6,996 across the borough. Are there any bare lamposts left? 

Looks like Bob's petition has been pulled by https://t.co/eQE2QZy6o2. It was going so well too! Had over 4 signatures! https://t.co/T27Qvp3b4A

— Elisabeth Anderson (@velobetty) August 1, 2019

There'll be five angry signatories if they do decide to pull it...

For those who don't recall, Dirty Sanchez was a mid-2000's 'stunt show' set in the valleys in which the subjects harm themselves in various ways and film the evidence - a Welsh Jackass, if you will. 

About five years ago, one of the stars of the show Matthew Pritchard had an epiphany after struggling with alcohol addiction and mental health issues, subsequently going vegan and even bagging his own vegan cooking show on the BBC. He also got well into fitness, and started doing ultra-endurance triathlon and cycling events. 

His gluttony for punishment ramped up to another level recently as he lined up for Deca UK, competing in the continuous event where participants have to complete ten Ironmans, with the clock running continuously. Pritchard finished in 248 hours, 42 minutes and 30 seconds yesterday evening, swimming 24 miles, cycling 1,120 miles and rounding off with a 262 mile run. 

The event was won by Mark Dodgson, who finished in a mere 235 hours, 20 minutes and 12 seconds.  

Unfortunately for road.cc staffers the off.road.cc gang have bagsied this one, and you can read all about the juicy tech details over on off.road.cc right now. 

North of Tyne mayor Jamie Driscoll has told Chronicle Live that he’s working to create a post of walking and cycling commissioner.

Driscoll has no transport powers, but campaigners say a commissioner could lobby for new, high-quality transport options to help people switch from cars.

"Sustainable transport is key priority for me and we're already working on it,” said Driscoll. “I have met with Chris Boardman and looked at the work they're doing in Manchester. I'm working with Sustrans, the sustainable travel organisation based in Newcastle, and with colleagues across the region to help us develop a really effective policy that is sustainable for the North of Tyne.

"An Active Travel Commissioner is one of the areas we will be exploring. The benefits of walking and cycling are obvious in terms of climate change, tackling obesity, general health and quality of life. As a keen cyclist myself, I am always happy to meet directly with groups to discuss ways we can work at a community level as well as supporting high profile events such as the Tour of Britain to promote healthy travel."

In a development straight out of a certain spoof music-themed movie from the 80's (although thankfully this one wasn't fatal), the Bahrain-Merida rider is unable to race the San Sebastien Clasica due to a "minor home accident" caused by a lawn tractor. In a statement, Bahrain-Merida said: "The unfortunate event happened to the Team Bahrain Merida rider while gardening with his garden tractor this morning at his house in Halen.

Dylan suffered a facial wound, that required 15 stitches in his forehead. Due to this and a bashed up face, unfortunately, he will miss the upcoming ‘Clasica San Sebastian’. All of us at Team Bahrain Merida wish him a speedy recovery!" 

Let's hope none of the other members of the team spontaneously combust, choke on someone else's vomit or are eaten by a pet python during the rest of their race preparations... 

We don't want to give this cretin any more publicity than is necessary, but here's a selection of the best replies...

Hey, Bob. Sign this ya massive nugget. https://t.co/kuvSELoKLp pic.twitter.com/edgor5JwCh

— Martin Porter  (@TheCyclingScot) 31 July 2019

1) Road tax no longer exists. 2) Vehicle Excise Duty goes into general gov. money pot - not towards road maintenance. 3) Drivers of electric/low emission cars are exempt from VED like cyclists - should they be subjected to your tax? I look forward to your response.

— Phil Bovey (@PhillyBillyB) 31 July 2019

Electric cars are not "exempt" from VED, they are subject but pay £0. Important distinction as admin of VED costs £3.75 per vehicle per year. So if cyclists did become subject like electric cars it would cost an additional £150m per year for the Government to collect the extra £0

— ReCycledParent (@re_parent) 31 July 2019

I'm fine with paying £20 if drivers pay for road wear proportionally. Road wear is a function of the 4th power of mass. For a 1.7 ton car, that's £1.6 million if me + bike+ luggage is 100kg

— Nick Cumming (@nickcumming) 31 July 2019

So you propose cyclists, who already pay for the roads through income and council tax, who don't pollute, don't kill hundreds of people per year and don't cause potholes, pay extra on top of their current contributions, in order to fix potholes that motor vehicles create?

— Aleks Ivanov (@Dehibernate) July 31, 2019

Will my 4yr old daughter need one for her bike? Ps how do I claim back 20 yrs of taxes paid? Seeing as I don’t pay them, I’d quite like £000’s back. I’d love a new bike.

— Howard Crompton (@CromptonHoward) July 31, 2019