We love cycling. No, we really love cycling, and we like to dwell on the positive whenever possible. But sometimes, just sometimes, it can be – what’s the word? – challenging.
Here are 18 things that we reckon every cyclist hates. Do you agree?
1 Clicking down a gear, only to find out you’re already in the lowest gear
That’s bad. Really bad.
2 Thinking you’re at the top of the hill, then discovering you aren’t
What, there’s more? How much more? Oh no!
3 The bonk
Blowing up, the hunger knock, hitting the wall… When you’re out of energy, it feels like the end of the world.
4 Creaks and squeaks
Is it the headset? The bottom bracket? The saddle rails? Your knees?
You can sometimes go around the whole bike systematically eliminating each individual component as the source of a mysterious noise until there are none left. And it still bloody creaks.
5 Red traffic lights
They’re especially bad if they’re at the bottom of a hill. All that momentum gone in a flash. Grrr!
6 Cold fingers
Still, it’s not as bad as the feeling of cold fingers coming back to life. That’s pure evil.
7 Punctures
It goes without saying, really.
8 You attack as hard as you can, check over your shoulder to see how much of a gap you have… and they’re still on your wheel
Bollocks.
9 Forgetting you’re clipped in until it’s too late
Don’t even try to make out it didn’t hurt. You’re fooling no one.
10 Your light goes out
You knew you should have recharged it, didn’t you?
11 It starts to rain the moment you put your kit on
You had nice weather all morning too. Also, while we’re at it: needing to use the toilet as soon as you put your bibs on.
12 Putting on wet kit for your commute home
It rained on the way into work this morning and the seatpad is still soggy. Urgh!
13 Unacknowledged waves
You wave or nod at a cyclist coming the other way and they don’t do it back. Rude!
14 Tyre sidewall splitting
The first you feel is a strange knocking coming from either the fork or the chainstays. If you’re really unlucky, within a few seconds you’ll hear a sound like a gunshot. That’s the inner tube exploding. Now you’re in trouble.
15 Getting dropped
From beginner to World Champion, it hurts just the same.
16 Running out of drink
This usually happens when you’re in the back of beyond, rarely when there’s a service station just around the corner.
17 The turbo
A lot of us do it, but only as a means to an end. You put up with the short-term pain for the long-term fitness gains. But you know there are some lunatics who actually enjoy it?
18 Getting caught in the rain
This usually happens just after you’ve cleaned your bike, when you’re wearing a white jersey, or on the day you forgot your waterproof. Or all three.
Over to you. What did we miss? Don’t hold back now!
Presumably they're ones that escaped from earlier experiments?...
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D-
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