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Cyclist stops for red light... nearly gets taken out by light-jumping driver behind; 'Keen cyclist' Anthony Browne the government's new cycling and walking czar; Cock Lane to Dick Place epic ride; Win the Tour on Heinz sachets? + more on the live blog

It's the middle of the week live blog, Dan Alexander bringing you all the news, reaction and more this Wednesday...

SUMMARY

15 November 2023, 17:00
Cyclist stops for red light... nearly gets taken out by light-jumping driver behind

Let's finish the day with this video from Righttobikeit, the Irish rider documenting typical life as a cycle commuter. Today's clip is about red lights, a hot discussion topic on the old interwebs... although this one might be a bit of a twist on the classic ranty person complaining about cyclists riding through red lights because of 'safety issues', while also being very quiet about other dangers...

In fact, Righttobikeit says he "gets them daily at this stage" and "just rarely posts them". Case in point, number two...

Surprise surprise though, some of the reaction to the video has centred around his riding, one person claiming he shouldn't have stopped as it was "unsafe to do so". "That's asking to get hit from behind. You should have proceeded through without delay. It's also unlikely the car could have stopped safely". I'm sensing a Schrödinger's cyclist: red light edition.

Thankfully that appears to be a minority view, plenty pointing out the driver being unable to stop is more to do with their own excessive speed and lack of stopping distance behind a vulnerable road user.

15 November 2023, 16:46
Drink driver who sped through red light and left teenage cyclist with life-changing injuries, before letting wife take the blame, jailed for two years and ten months
15 November 2023, 15:10
The case for the defence: Newly appointed cycling and walking minister raised £12,800 for Ukraine Humanitarian Appeal by cycling from London to Cambridge
Anthony Browne fundraiser cycle

Keen cyclist status pending... 

> Anthony's London to Cambridge Cycle Ride for Ukraine

Anthony Browne Strava
Anthony Browne Strava

I'm now currently sorting through Australian crit racers and half the south of England to find the minister's Strava... what any of this means for active travel policy remains to be seen of course...

As the Guardian's deputy political editor says... "Sounds promising*"... the asterisk being that "this is in the context of a transport secretary and No 10 which are very anti-cycling, of course".

Wait a minute...

Ah, right, yep, okay... as you were...

15 November 2023, 14:34
'Keen cyclist' Anthony Browne replaces Jesse Norman as government's cycling and walking czar

It's fair to say the self-professed 'keen cyclist' title is often met with suspicion, especially when the person doing the self-professing has a sudden and particularly strong view on a cycling-related debate or, in this case, has been appointed as the Minister for Decarbonisation of Transport & the Future of Transport at the Department for Transport, a role under which active travel is well within their remit.

Are you actually a cyclist or are the words a hollow attempt to gain trust? Perhaps I'm overly cynical, but all remains to be seen as Anthony Browne — you guessed it, a keen cyclist according to his website — takes over the role from Jesse Norman.

In an out-of-date post on his website, Browne says "cycling has a significant role to play in tackling some of the biggest health and environmental challenges that we face" before going on to cite the now-cut active travel budget as proof of the government's support...

> High Court grants legal challenge to government's cycling funding cuts – as ministers forced to concede they were aware of "devastating" impact of decision to slash active travel budget

The reaction to the appointment has been mixed, Cycling UK saying it "looks forward to working" together and expressing a "hope that he'll support the policies and funding" that will enable people to choose to walk and cycle short local journeys.

"We hope the new minister will be able to re-establish the positive rhetoric on our transport options, and ensure we're maximising the economic, health and environmental benefits there are in having a sustainable transport network that facilitates choice in how we move around," Cycling UK's chief executive Sarah Mitchell said.

CamCycle, the campaign group for cycling in Cambridge, added that it hopes to see the South Cambridgeshire MP using his background in the city to "refocus government policies and funding on its ambitious cycling goals".

So what does the man himself have to say? Commenting on his appointment to the role that will require him to oversee electric cars, autonomous vehicles, active travel, e-scooters, sustainable aviation, and maritime and rail decarbonisation, Browne said he is "thrilled".

"I am thrilled to be appointed to this dynamic and challenging brief. Having worked closely with the government and others advocating for local transport projects like the A428 rebuild, I am excited to take on this packed portfolio," he said.

"Electric and autonomous vehicles, active travel, and sustainable practices in aviation and maritime are not just about technology; they’re about improving people’s lives and preserving our environment for future generations."

A brief scan of social media suggests the jury is still out on this one, one commenter saying they "could weep" and comparing putting Browne in charge of decarbonisation to "like putting Genghis Khan in charge of peace negotiations". Another less optimistic review below...

Let the fun begin... 

15 November 2023, 13:45
Intermarché-Circus-Wanty riders fined by UCI and ordered to attend educational course after posting racist gesture during race in China
15 November 2023, 13:41
Global Cycling Network set to close GCN+ and GCN app in December due to "changing media industry landscape"
15 November 2023, 12:07
Sandy Balls, Fighting Cocks, Bell End: A brilliantly childish live blog comments section

I'm not going to pretend I didn't ask for this (or want this exact thing to happen), but the live blog comments section is under siege from X-rated place names that could have made it onto the Edinburgh lads' penis pilgrimage...

 Let the immaturity begin...

kil0ran: "Could have popped down to the New Forest and ridden Sandy Balls to Fighting Cocks a couple of hundred times. Pub at each end of the segment (Cock to Balls on Strava)"

Cock to balls Strava

Fantastic.

Editor Jack was disappointed to see no visit to Bell End, the street his auntie and uncle live round the corner from... just off Mincing Lane.

Live blog comment 15/11/2023

chrisonatrike: "See you and raise you (aha) Cocking Lane, near Addingham.  Surprisingly long, once you get on it."

Kapelmuur: "I used to drive through Wyre Piddle in Herefordshire, which sounded painful."

hawkinspeter: "Mrs HawkinsPeter and I once looked at a house for sale on King Dick's Lane in Bristol. It's a lovely old cottage but unfortunately far too small for us."

 chrisonatrike: "I hope they didn't have a hard time in Penistone."

And mark1a reliably informs us that in Dorset there aren't so many phallic place names, they're more scatological instead...

Live blog comment 15/11/2023

Scatological. There's a word you don't hear every day. Top work everybody...

15 November 2023, 11:52
Gifts for cyclists under £50 2023 — the best affordable Christmas presents for the cyclist in your life
15 November 2023, 10:42
The new must-have ride fuel... Heinz tomato ketchup?

What's going on here?

Anyone ever been so deep in a bonk they've had to raid a takeaway for ketchup sachets? 

In the interests of maintaining our reputation for the very highest levels of investigative journalism we've done some digging. How much Heinz ketchup would Jonas Vingegaard need to consume to win a Tour de France mountain stage?

Assuming we're aiming for the very highest level of carb intake, around 120g per hour, and assuming it's a five-hour stage... that's 600g of carbohydrate to consume. Per 11g sachet of Heinz ketchup Jonas will be getting a measly 2.6g of carbs, meaning to hit 600g he'll have to get 231 sachets down him (all without falling off his bike or throwing up on Wout van Aert). 46 an hour...

Excuse me while I take five to work out where I'm going to display my Pulitzer Prize.

15 November 2023, 10:06
UPDATE: Met Police confirms helmet advice for cyclist, who was knocked off their bike along with their pet cat by a moped rider, came from a plain-clothes police officer – and calls on "all road users to abide by the Highway Code"
'Police' scold cyclist riding with pet cat in basket for not wearing a helmet after moped rider knocks them off (@sigirides/Twitter)

We've been in touch with the Metropolitan Police regarding yesterday's story...

> 'Police' scold cyclist riding with pet cat in basket for not wearing a helmet after moped rider knocks them off bike

The force confirmed the car that stopped at the scene, and woman who offered helmet advice were police. Interestingly, the comment includes the claim the footage is "heavily edited" and calls for all road users to be "mindful and abide by the Highway Code".

You can read the full update and comment here...

15 November 2023, 10:05
Nightingale Gardens & Landscapes wins the 'you can't carry that by bike' award for the week...
15 November 2023, 09:46
"Can't even fit a bicycle?": Elon Musk's Tesla 'Cybertruck' goes viral for all the wrong reasons

Feel free to skip to avoid all Elon Musk mentions...

This post about the Tesla 'Cybertruck' is getting plenty of attention. What is a Cybertruck I hear you ask? Well, according to Tesla it's got "better utility than a truck with more performance than a sports car". (Apparently, punctuation doesn't exist in Elon's world)...

Anyway, this photo of the Spesh mountain bike unable to fit in the back, (and questionably stored for avoiding damaging your frame, might I add) got people chuckling, a few comments to the effect of 'you might as well save yourself the trouble of having to own and be seen using one of these by just riding the bike'. Just an idea... and you'll get no arguments from us...

15 November 2023, 09:37
"If we build safe cycling infrastructure, scenes like this will become the norm"
15 November 2023, 08:52
Cock Lane to Dick Place: Student cycling club completes 660km X-rated epic

Kudos at the ready... 

 

 Wallets too if you fancy applauding this monster day (and a bit) in the saddle with a donation to the University of Edinburgh group's Movember fundraiser, which has already racked up more than £5,000 for the charity through this amusing (but more than a bit barmy) ride.

In total, 667km from Cock Lane in London to Dick Place in Edinburgh, setting off on Saturday morning before eventually rolling back into the Scottish capital's phallic finish line on Sunday afternoon. Just the 28 hours moving time, 4,800m of climbing, 36 hours elapsed time, and 24km/h average. A truly girthy day out.

X-rated route (Will Brown/Strava)
X-rated route (Alex Mutter/Strava)

Speaking to MyLondon about the erectile epic, Alex Mutter said the idea came via a meme that was doing the rounds, showing the "ultimate road trip across the UK through all sexual innuendo-named places"... "we thought it was perfect for a Movember route so decided on Cock Lane to Dick Place to help raise awareness".

"When I've told people what we're doing, the main response I get it is people asking where are you staying along the week, that will be fun doing a week of cycling. We've had to say no we're going in one go, people don't get that we're going all in one go.

"Seeing two sunrises and two sunsets in one ride was pretty surreal. We were all very emotional, this group have done a couple of challenges together but this one seemed like something special.

X-rated route (Gregor McArthur/Strava)

"It was very emotional at the finishing line - we all knew it was the hardest challenge we'd done mentally and physically so seeing each other having finished it was really something special."

Chapeau... (cue the penis-related puns in the comments)...

Dan is the road.cc news editor and has spent the past four years writing stories and features, as well as (hopefully) keeping you entertained on the live blog. Having previously written about nearly every other sport under the sun for the Express, and the weird and wonderful world of non-league football for the Non-League Paper, Dan joined road.cc in 2020. Come the weekend you'll find him labouring up a hill, probably with a mouth full of jelly babies, or making a bonk-induced trip to a south of England petrol station... in search of more jelly babies.

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67 comments

Avatar
number9dream | 5 months ago
1 like

Could have gone continental and gone into Pussy at the base of col de la Madelaine

Avatar
mitsky | 6 months ago
2 likes

Regarding the driver not stopping for red and some claiming it was unsafe to do so, either the driver was going too fast or....?

And my own instance, previously mentioned on road.cc:
https://road.cc/content/news/deja-vu-met-decline-prosecute-rlj-driver-27...

Avatar
Wheelywheelygood | 6 months ago
1 like

A cycleist stopped for a red light did anyone see the flock of pigs flying overhead following Santa clauses sleigh as he gave a lift to the Easter bunny 

Avatar
chrisonabike replied to Wheelywheelygood | 6 months ago
5 likes

I'd have a nap before operating any powered machinery if I were you.

Of course, if you're staying in this place, it's probably slightly safer to get around in that state, but would still caution against it.

Avatar
AlsoSomniloquism replied to Wheelywheelygood | 6 months ago
8 likes

As someone in a wheelchair (not sure if you are powered or not) do you go onto car websites and complain about pavement parkers who block your way when parked on the pavement? Do you go onto wheelchair user forums and complain about the people who use mobility scooters with the "on-road" speeds set even when they are using pedestranalised areas? 

Or do you just come onto cycling websites to make comments about "woah a cyclist has stopped at a red light!!!!" and not even notice the 1.5 tonne 30mph vehicle that didn't bother.

Avatar
perce replied to Wheelywheelygood | 6 months ago
6 likes

I saw a flock of pigs - I saw them years ago when they were supporting a herd of seagulls.

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brooksby replied to Wheelywheelygood | 6 months ago
4 likes

Wheelywheelygood wrote:

A cycleist stopped for a red light did anyone see the flock of pigs flying overhead following Santa clauses sleigh as he gave a lift to the Easter bunny 

Hang on - so you're saying I imagined stopping at two sets of red lights on my way home last night, and three this morning?  Craaaazzy... 

 

(Reminds me of that saying: just because you have never seen squirrels having sex doesn't mean that they never do it).

Avatar
Steve K replied to brooksby | 6 months ago
4 likes

brooksby wrote:

(Reminds me of that saying: just because you have never seen squirrels having sex doesn't mean that they never do it).

Did you have to post that?  God knows what pictures Peter will be digging out now...

Avatar
chrisonabike replied to brooksby | 6 months ago
2 likes

brooksby wrote:

(Reminds me of that saying: just because you have never seen squirrels having sex doesn't mean that they never do it).

I dunno which is worse.  I thought they just metamorphosed from pine cones or something?

Avatar
brooksby | 6 months ago
7 likes

Sentences that start with "I'm a keen cyclist" never end well, do they? 

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bike_food replied to brooksby | 6 months ago
4 likes

brooksby wrote:

Sentences that start with "I'm a keen cyclist" never end well, do they? 

It's a cycling specific version of "I'm not being horrible or anything but..."

Avatar
Morgoth985 replied to bike_food | 6 months ago
7 likes

some of my best friends are ...

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brooksby replied to Morgoth985 | 6 months ago
1 like

Morgoth985 wrote:

some of my best friends are ...

Le's just hope nobody ever says "Some of my best friends are keen cyclists"

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dubwise | 6 months ago
1 like

Will Anthony Browne do a sponsored ride to raise funds to help those in Gaza?

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BIRMINGHAMisaDUMP replied to dubwise | 6 months ago
4 likes

That crossed my mind too. But considering nearly 300 MPs yesterday voted AGAINST calling for a ceasefire in Palestine it seems that this particular genocide is OK. 

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Legin | 6 months ago
2 likes

That epic ride, did they stop off here for a PNB?

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Seagull2 | 6 months ago
2 likes

In Dublin ,  it's only 7 mins by bike from Ballsbridge to Ringsend 

( it's a giant of a city ) 

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HoldingOn replied to Seagull2 | 6 months ago
7 likes

Seagull2 wrote:

( it's a giant of a city ) 

Is that because it keeps doubling?

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giff77 replied to Seagull2 | 6 months ago
2 likes

Dublin is too civilised. Head further out for Muff in Donegal; Hackballs Cross, Louth; *Spillane, Kerry; Cum, Mayo;  Lower Balix, Tyrone; Fannystown, Wexford to name but a few.  Now that I've set myself up for a ban I better shut up. 

*just caught the auto correct. That should read Spunkane in Kerry.  

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the little onion replied to giff77 | 6 months ago
5 likes

I believe the village of Muff is on the coast, and has a Muff Diving Club (actually, that one is true. Google it yourself)

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HoldingOn replied to the little onion | 6 months ago
4 likes

On the way into Muff, its now a Texaco garage, but it used to be run by Top. Gave rise to many a useful advertising sign informing you "Top Muff next left"

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Rendel Harris replied to HoldingOn | 6 months ago
1 like

HoldingOn wrote:

On the way into Muff, its now a Texaco garage, but it used to be run by Top. Gave rise to many a useful advertising sign informing you "Top Muff next left"

They missed a trick by not adding "filling station" after "Top Muff".

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chrisonabike | 6 months ago
3 likes

"If we build safe cycling infrastructure, scenes like this will become the norm"

Initially, yes - but if we build enough, properly* then we'll likely see the bike buses, hi-vis tabards and even (gasp) helmets possibly disappear (according to personal choice / societal mores, I say hurriedly...).  And then we'll see scenes like this:

Culemborg, NL

Oulu, Finland

Assen, NL

* And tame the cars on the "quiet residential streets" - e.g. by ensuring they're not through-routes for motor traffic.

Avatar
Yian | 6 months ago
1 like

GCN+ closing down... how to watch races now?

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Freddy56 replied to Yian | 6 months ago
1 like

just got the email- whats the story?

 

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Steve K replied to Freddy56 | 6 months ago
1 like

Freddy56 wrote:

just got the email- whats the story?

 

Is it all just going to Discovery Plus?

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mark1a replied to Steve K | 6 months ago
1 like

Steve K wrote:

Freddy56 wrote:

just got the email- whats the story?

 

Is it all just going to Discovery Plus?

Looks like it... that's a lot more money for a lot more unwanted stuff.

https://www.globalcyclingnetwork.com/general/news/gcn-and-gcn-app-to-close

https://help.globalcyclingnetwork.com/hc/en-gb/articles/19965721079697

I hope they put the GCN+ Originals back catalogue somewhere, there's some great stuff.

Avatar
Left_is_for_Losers replied to Yian | 6 months ago
0 likes

Yian wrote:

GCN+ closing down... how to watch races now?

It's all here https://www.globalcyclingnetwork.com/general/news/gcn-and-gcn-app-to-close

Worst decision for me, don't know where I'm going to watch racing now - I cba to subscribe to Discovery+ or Eurosport or which is best. 

Avatar
Patrick9-32 | 6 months ago
7 likes

On the Cybertruck, that is the standard way for people to carry mountain bikes in pickup trucks, not a cybertruck failing. There are tailgate pads from many companies which go over the gate to protect your frame and you can line up 5 or so bikes across the back of the truck that way while being able to get them down without climbing into the bed. 

The cybertruck has so many glaring issues for cyclists (big flat front, insane speed, poor visibiltiy, owned almost exclusively by cunts etc) that we don't need to make up new ones. 

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