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Could our Tour de France on Zwift April Fools joke become a reality?

Gotcha! But how would a Grand eTour work?

Well we best come clean. This, shockingly, is a big fat April Fool’s joke.

But it has got us thinking; could this become a reality? As many of you have already said in the comments here and on social media, we’d definitely watch the Tour du France on Zwift.

So we’re now wondering how the TdF, or any race for that matter, would run on an eRacing platform. Give us some suggestions down in the comments below.

If you missed the original ruse, it’s here…

Organisers say that the event will be live streamed with daily weigh-ins and height measurements taken

With many races being cancelled, it will come as no surprise that the Tour de France has also had to adapt its plans for 2020.

road.cc Quiz Corner - Test your French with these Tour de France phrases.

But in a shock move, ASO announced that it has partnered with Zwift to stage the race in Watopia.

The race will keep its 21-day format and visit London, Richmond, Yorkshire and New York, before heading into the Watopian mountains for a testing two weeks of Alpe du Zwift summit finishes.

Chris Froome gave a mixed response when asked about the move. “I’m feeling ok about this to be honest. I know I’ve got the best ramp test around which will help on Alpe du Zwift. But I saw CyclingTips reporting a new Zwift crash feature. I want that taken out, because I bet my avatar will get hacked and hit the deck in the opening TT.”

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

NEW: Zwift announces new ‘Crash’ in-game feature:⁠ ⁠ Zwift has had an unexpectedly busy month or two, but has somehow still found time to roll out a new update effective today. A number of small bugs have been fixed, but the marquee announcement is the addition of a new ‘crash’ feature in its repertoire of in-game PowerUps. This feature is now available to verified pro riders, and to premium subscribers now at the $39/mo price tier.⁠ ⁠ The Crash PowerUp works like any other in the world of the game, but is only available to be used in the final 5km of Zwift race events. Pressing the on-screen crash power-up button will send everyone up to 5 seconds behind to the ground in an enormous pile-up of electronic carbon fibre.⁠ ⁠ The first person to deploy this new power-up within the final 5km will get the advantage, but if others have the power-up available to them and use within 0.5 seconds, they will glide through the carnage unscathed.⁠ ⁠ If you as a rider are brought down by the Crash PowerUp, you’ll find yourself out of contention unless you unleash a five second sprint from a standing start at 1000 watts or 12w/kg – whichever comes first. If you can achieve this, you’ll regain your place in the race and be given a ‘Draft’ power-up for the chase back on. Premium subscribers brought down by the Crash will receive the ‘Double Draft’ PowerUp.⁠ ⁠ Zwift co-founder Enrique Min said in a press release accompanying the update that “the crash power-up adds a new element to the Zwift experience and simulates real life racing. Crashing is a part of racing and we’ve had an enormous amount of requests to bring this in-game by the pros who are finding that racing against amateurs tough these days. It also presents a great revenue opportunity to engage our highest valued customers and funnel our sketchiest riders to our Zwift repair shop.”⁠ ⁠ Zwift previously experimented with the in-game ‘lap out’ feature but that proved far too real and prone to abuse from savvy e-racers, just like real racing, and went against the spirit of e-sports.

A post shared by C Y C L I N G T I P S (@cyclingtips) on

Geraint Thomas, meanwhile, thinks he’ll have the advantage over his teammate. “Don’t get me wrong, Froomey is one of the most dedicated athletes I know and a great mate. But as I’m a track rider at heart, I reckon I can beat him when all that matters are the numbers.”

Wiggins tips Thomas for Tour de France – if it goes ahead

“And while he grew up mountain biking around South Africa, I was riding around in circles. In Wales. In December. I think that should give me the mental edge to sit on a sweaty turbo in my front room for six hours per day.”

Not everyone is happy with the move. A large group of Spanish climbers have written to the UCI, demanding that they be allowed to use rocker plates so that they can turbo with panache.

"Only two world wars have stopped the Tour de France" – Christian Prudhomme

Mikel Landa of Bahrain Merida reacted angrily saying “how am I meant to dance away from the group while nonchalantly holding 450w in the drops without a drop of sweat, when the bike is fixed to the bloody ground. Fuming I am!”

Tour de France Race Director Christian Prudhomme was even more annoyed. When told about the change he was heard to mutter "ah, merde!".

Who are you betting on? And which rider is most likely to use a power-up through the feed zone? Let us know in the comments below. We’re looking forward to seeing the stage profiles when we get them!

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19 comments

Avatar
glp | 4 years ago
0 likes

they should so do this

Avatar
dave_t | 4 years ago
1 like

OK I'lladmit it, you got me there for a minute. laugh

All this lockdown is affecting my ability to think straight!

Avatar
CygnusX1 | 4 years ago
2 likes

haha, nearly had me there! 

Avatar
trisc | 4 years ago
1 like

Yes good one. Have you seen Ribble cycles website today?

Avatar
Kendalred replied to trisc | 4 years ago
1 like

Ha!  Yeah, I was about to click 'buy' on that Famdem - then I realised I don't have kids and the other half isn't that keen on cycling. 

Avatar
Liam Cahill replied to Kendalred | 4 years ago
1 like

We really want a Famdem for the office

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CygnusX1 replied to trisc | 4 years ago
0 likes

Took a look just now - SLOOF family watt-bomb on the AdZ.  4

Avatar
Kendalred replied to CygnusX1 | 4 years ago
1 like
CygnusX1 wrote:

Took a look just now - SLOOF family watt-bomb on the AdZ.  4

One of them must be called Lirpa, surely!

Avatar
FatAndFurious | 4 years ago
1 like

No no no - it's going to be in South Korea, where they have CV19 under control. A French newspaper said so, so it must be true.

https://www.lepoint.fr/cyclisme/exclusif-le-tour-de-france-2020-aura-lie...

😁

Avatar
Derfelzog | 4 years ago
1 like

You totally had me, dude.  I was actually excited by the prospect. Make it happen.

 

Avatar
zero_trooper | 4 years ago
0 likes

Yep, Wiggo is coming out of retirement for it. Signed up to Team BPE* for big buck$!

Cameron Jeffers is his lead out kind-of-guy. 

*Big Padded Envelope

Avatar
peted76 | 4 years ago
4 likes

Ah this had me going for a bit... 

Particularly liked Chris Froomes comment and that Mikel Landa has turned Welsh.. 'Fuming I am!'

Avatar
Liam Cahill replied to peted76 | 4 years ago
3 likes

Geraint's influence, that. Rumour has it that Mikel is a huge Gavin & Stacey fan...

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maj | 4 years ago
2 likes

you had me, ngl

in these strange times anything is possible :eyes: 

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Pavery1 | 4 years ago
1 like

Seriously though, imagine if this did happen. At least there would be something to look forward toindecision

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Moist von Lipwig | 4 years ago
3 likes

very good laugh

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OnTheRopes | 4 years ago
2 likes

haha, the headline did pull me in but then I remembered the date.

Avatar
Liam Cahill replied to OnTheRopes | 4 years ago
2 likes

Happy that I got one of ya!  4

Avatar
zero_trooper replied to Liam Cahill | 4 years ago
1 like

Good effort laugh

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